Last month, we tallied the Oscar nominations collected by each of the major agencies. That chart looked like this:

Juan Jose Campanella’s “The Secret in Their Eyes” (El secreto de sus ojos), which won the Oscar for best foreign-language film Sunday night, will screen at the Miami International Film Festival after its awards ceremony March 13 at the Gusman Center for the Performing Arts. A second screening will be held the following afternoon at Regal Cinemas South Beach.

Last night, “The Daily Show” did a typically brilliant segment conflating the Iraqi parliamentary elections with Oscar night. The second half of this clip, at the Huffington Post, features Jon Oliver giving a hilarious acceptance speech with regard to our involvement in Iraq (and Samantha Bee bullies in right on time).

Every public event has its quirks and misfires, its head-scratching moments and gleeful absurdities. The Oscars inevitably has its share.

And I’d like to take this opportunity to remind you of just how many there were.

Indeed, so much misguided flailing made its way onstage that I have to limit this to just 10 or I’ll still be writing when next year’s ceremony starts.

While the Oscars ceremony played much like a film directed by show co-producer Adam Shankman — cozy, a bit precious and pretty tame — there were some great unexpected lines delivered from the stage. Here are my favorites, but I invite you to send in your own nominations.

Steve Martin, during the opening bit with co-host Alec Baldwin, referred to Meryl Streep’s record for most acting Oscar nominations: “Or as I like to think of it: most losses.”

Baldwin, during the opening, described Gabourey Sidibe’s character in “Precious” as being told she’s worthless and that nobody likes her. Then: “Hey, I’m with CAA, too!”

Well, the drizzle threatens to dampen dresses outside the Kodak Theatre, but the air seems to crackle as always in the run-up to this most glamorous and ludicrous of awards shows. Before we get to the meat of the ceremony, THR staffer Lesley Goldberg is manning the press bleachers out front, feeding me chatter from the carpet arrivals.

Here are some of her dispatches:

Jeff Bridges continues his triumphant, graceful stroll to the best actor Oscar this weekend with another magazine cover, this time for Guitar Aficionado.

No, that’s not a little gold statue in his hands. It’s a late 1930’s Gibson Roy Smeck stage deluxe. According to the editor-in-chief of GA, these guitars were originally meant to be played Hawaiian style on the lap, but Bridges’ has been converted to play like a normal guitar.

The issue doesn’t come out for another two weeks, but in the story Bridges springboards off his heralded performance as Bad Blake in Scott Cooper’s “Crazy Heart” to talk about his own musical obsessions and notable guitar collection (cover line: “The Dude Collects!”).

“Bad Blake is one of those ‘Dude’ parts,” Bridges says in the piece. “It’s the kind of part you know you’re born to play. Bad’s the last of a breed, one of those guys they just don’t make anymore — like Kris [Kristofferson] or Waylon Jennings or Merle Haggard. The role was such an open canvas for me to work with. And hey, the chance to actually do my own singing and guitar playing on film — what a trip!”

With news circulating today that “The Hurt Locker” producer Nicolas Chartier has been banned from the Academy Awards ceremony Sunday for emails he sent violating Oscar rules, my only question is: Are you serious? Come on.

With all the corrupt shenanigans and barely whispered smear campaigns that have polluted the Oscar race in years past, this guy gets expelled for sending an email? To me, this is just another example of how there are two sets of rules in Hollywood: those for money-makers, and those for the rest.

According to People.com, multiple Oscar winner Sean Penn recently had this to say about Woody Harrelson, who is up for a best supporting actor Oscar Sunday night:

“‘The Messenger‘ is one of those rare platforms for a familiar American actor to reinvent himself. Woody Harrelson conjures a heart and presence of previously untapped immensity and emotional power. He deserves a BIG nod. He’s done the hardest thing an actor can do. He’s made something new.”

As she did for the Golden Globes weekend, THR party maven Alene Dawson has compiled a list of some of the major happenings on and around Oscar weekend.

We will be updating and adding to the list over the next nine increasingly hectic days, so be sure to check back.

You gotta give Adam Shankman and Bill Mechanic, the producers of the upcoming 82nd Annual Academy Awards, credit for thinking way outside of the box.

Interviewed Thursday by Teri Gross on NPR’s “Fresh Air,” Shankman was asked how he and Mechanic had set about shaking up the Oscars. The always-candid Shankman revealed that when he and Mechanic first met for lunch, they immediately agreed that the person who should host the show would be none other than Sacha Baron Cohen.

More than a few people have been wondering about this off-the-grid political satire “In the Loop,” which has been scoring award nominations for its screenplay. IFC Films picked up the feature after last year’s Sundance Film Festival, where it premiered, and the indie outfit wants Academy voters to give the script a read before their votes are due March 2.

You’re welcome to take a gander yourself.

The adapted screenplay, written by Jesse Armstrong, Simon Blackwell, Tony Roche and Armando Iannucci, who also directed, has drawn best screenplay nominations from BAFTA, the London critics, the Chicago critics and the Academy. The British Independent Film Awards and the New York Film Critics Circle awarded it best screenplay honors.

And here’s a special note from Iannucci about the script.